Wednesday, March 4, 2009

"He's Still Working On Me..."


I've been thinking alot lately. Which is never a good thing... but I've been praying alot too... which is better than just thinking. About my kids as Keona approaches her "pre-teen" age and I have no clue what I'm doing as a parent of a "tween", about the economy and finances, about life after college (for Scott that is!) about friends, family, and friends' families....

See, I' m a "do-er".... I like to plan, schedule, budget, list, plan some more, and then do! I don't manage so well when things don't go according to plan. My plan that is...which is the problem. I'm realizing how many things I can't plan for... Thankfully, I have an amazing husband who listens to my concerns (that we can do nothing about) and lovingly points me back to the God's word, and ultimately to God. I'm learning. I'm afraid it's going to be a very long process (like life-long) of things being out of my control, and me learning to take them to God and leave them there. I want to take them to God... but then I want to go off and fix them! It's the "leaving them" that I struggle with. I know He's faithful, and that the Lord's timing is always perfect, I've seen Him come through for us too many times to count...

I'm just really not good at waiting. (ask Scott...)

Last night I poured my heart out to God, in prayer for friends, family, my children...and cried like a baby. When I see someone else with a struggle, or we're struggling ourselves, I pray, and in a sense expect a "quick fix." Scott once again reminds me that God doesn't work like that, and I don't really want a quick fix...because I wouldn't like what it would take to get that quick fix.

True. I guess...

Ok...so back to praying, and begging God to make His answer a little bit quicker. Like I said, I'm working on it.

I've been so burdened for some people lately, and want so badly to see God do a miracle in and around their lives. I'm praying that God will give me the wisdom I need in these situations while I'm patiently prayerfully, waiting to see His hand at work.

And that's me confessing my faults, and mostly just thinking out loud. Or typing out loud...

Jeddy "closing his eyes" for bedtime prayers


Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.
-Psalm 24:14


LORD, thou hast heard the desire of the humble: thou wilt prepare their heart, thou wilt cause thine ear to hear:
- Psalm 10:17

2 comments:

  1. You have such a beautiful family, I love the pictures that you post they really are wonderful. Thanks for putting some of my same thoughts into words in this post, made me really think...

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  2. Wow... you probably don't want to hear this... but like mother, like daughter - my last week has been much the same - you get your "fixer" instinct from me I am afraid - sorry! Although its not all bad as we really do care - its just hard (and heart breaking at times) when we can't fix things!

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