Moments of Silence

What did your moment of silence say to you this year?

My workplace is a bustling charismatic place filled with communication and activity. I get there early in the morning, mostly before anyone, and it’s a little more peaceful. As people roll in, it starts to get going and then it doesn’t stop all day long. But this past week we had silence. Right in the middle of the busiest hours, the announcement went out to honour our fallen heroes with a moment of silence.

 

I can’t help think that silence is a special and valuable thing to many of us. To others, it’s the nightmare of reflection that demands a constantly denied response. Many of us spend our day running from the truth of the silence. Stopping to think, reflect, and be observant demands gratefulness and the honouring of those who provided the good things the silences remind us of.

Thank you to those who fought and those who lost so that I can enjoy the freedoms of our country.

Last Sunday our four oldest and some of their friends from our Bobcaygeon church travelled up the road to play for the service in Fenelon. I was the chauffer. So, we arrived about a half hour before the service and the kids practiced through their music and did a sound check. There were a good number of elderly folk in the sanctuary enjoying the practice. A lot of them stopped by to ask me who I was, and my systematic response was “I’m the girls’ dad.”

“Ohhhh, you’re the one..”

Hmmm.. Yup. I’m the one. Haha.

 After a few folks passed by me, and we neared the completion of the practice, one of the older men in front of me turned and just started talking to me. “You know… seeing those kids up there, having worked so hard to be involved like this.. well… You know we always say this and that about the young people today. But these kids give me some hope. There are some good kids around after all.”

What ever happened to respectfulness and gratefulness? Shouldn’t these folks who lost loved ones, and lived an honest life, and paid their taxes, and voted to keep us free, and helped provide us our lifestyle, meet with more honour than we in our generation greet them? Should it be so hard for them to find hope for when they’ve passed on?

Last Sunday our next-door neighbours were completing their move. The boys had helped them all week. Bob, our kind old man next door, (only to be replaced with another kind old man named Bob by the way.. lol) has taken to adopting our kids as his “grandkid neighbours”. Sunday when we got home from church we were a little surprised to see Jeddy doing math… voluntarily… in the afternoon… when it’s do-whatever-you-want time. Come to find out, the kid is getting his math done so he can help Bob finish moving during school time on Monday morning and see him off. I cried. I wish I had been that type of kid. A kid who honours the elderly, and shows love by his works. Before Bob left he told the new Bob, “You’re going to love these kids. They’re like my adopted grandkids. They’re the best-behaved kids I’ve ever seen…”

When I hear comments like that I can’t help but think how glad I am these kids turned out like me and not like their mother. I kid.. I kid..

We’ve been so blessed with great bonfire weather this year. We’ve been pretty much bug free for a couple months now, and yet the nice nights keep coming. It’s nice now because the sunset is early enough that we can have an after-dinner bonfire instead of staying up so late for it. A couple weeks back, I scheduled a bonfire on a Thursday night. I told everyone and they all thought I was joking. I was not. I love our fireside music practice and cuddle time by the fire. As I sit comfy in my cedar Muskoka chair on the porch in mid-November with my laptop and cup of tea, writing this, I am thinking tonight might be a good night for one too! Even though I love a good bonfire, the kids, having been busy all day and just finished their work for the day, have better things to do. Initially when I told everyone that Thursday on my way home that I was skipping dinner and heading straight to the fire pit, no one was really interested. I figured I would just enjoy the perfect evening and stars all by myself. I started up what was, in my opinion, the best built fire of the year, and nestled into my chair, feet up on the edge of the pit, looking up into the sky as the constellations slowly began to reveal themselves one star at a time… It was dark quickly, and though I could see the house I couldn’t see anything between me and the house. I heard the door, and someone heading down. It was my Hunny.J She was carrying a cup of coffee for me, and coming to join me. Then I heard the door again, and again, and slowly everyone came down the hill carrying their chair and some instruments too. I knew none of them wanted to be out there. But they did it for me. They were unselfish with their time for me.

Today, there is a dearth of honour and respect. There is a plague of laziness and selfishness. I say today, but really, it’s nothing new. It’s a symptom of ease. It’s a diseased fruit of our natural course. The culture today is one towards self-respect, and self-honouring, rather than honour and respect for the honourable.

Years ago, when I was working on the nightshift, I would often enjoy my lunch break outside watching the sunset while I read my Bible and had some time to reflect. One gentleman I worked with would often join me. We didn’t agree a lot of the time, but we enjoyed many gentle conversations about everything from Creation, to child-rearing, to the end of the world. He had a religious mind set, and really, we had the ideal respectful discussions, though we almost always disagreed. There was a mutual respect and honouring of each other that allowed us to be kind, and present our thoughts, and then gently disagree.

I started chatting with a man from another part of the world in an online game I used to play. We had a lot in common personally, including our conservative lifestyle at home, our homeschooling, and our large families. However, he is a knowledgeable and faithful Muslim and I am a Biblical Christian. In that very understanding, as we began to discuss our differing and agreeing opinions on matters of our faiths, we decided to be respectful and honour each other’s opinions. We spent many hours discussing important and valuable details with respect. He is more than a victorious argument to me. I respect him. I care for him. I pray for him. I wonder if we who claim to be people of faith were so kind in our discussion of all things, say, politics for instance, if we wouldn’t find a more peaceful forum for convincing others of our opinions. Maybe we would understand each other more if we were less about winning and more about love for our neighbours.

What did you think about in your moment of silence? What was it you were honouring? Who were you giving respect to? Or was that just an annoying archaic practice that wasted a minute of your year?

Take a few moments of silence today, to stop and think, to reflect, and to honour those who hope for the future in you.

“The fear of the LORD is the instruction of wisdom; and before honour is humility.” – Proverbs 15:33

Our Love-Hate Relationship

Written by Keona

My mom and I have what you would probably refer to as a love-hate relationship- some days we love each other; other days... not so much. When we love each other, it's great. I couldn’t ask for a better mother. She’s willing to listen to my problems and girl drama and never-ending stream of story plots. Her advice is great. Honestly, there is no woman whose word I would trust more. We love doing things together. Whether it’s watching a YouTube fail video, going shopping, or reading a new book, my mom is my first choice for a companion. If we got our heads together, I think some pretty awesome ideas would be the result. We work together when it comes to teaching grade nine algebra and I’m not sure what on earth she would do without me in that area. Watch lots of educational videos, I guess. Or maybe not do algebra at all. I mean, honestly, if you’ve ever actually used the algebra you learned in high school, you are a rare human being. Either way, what I’m trying to say is that we’re like best friends 25% of the time- we really are.

That other 75%, however, would very quickly convince you otherwise.

That’s right- NEWSFLASH!! 

This amazing mother that you see here all the time is only telling you half of the story. 

You want the truth? 

Click HERE. 

Yeah, she hasn’t changed.
If anything, she’s gotten worse.

The cat attacks Lily? Over her screaming, all that can be heard is Mom laughing herself to death.

Someone wipes out on the kitchen floor? Your normal mom might say, “Oh! Are you all right?” Not my Mom. She thinks it’s hilarious.

Just as long as there’s no broken bones or a need for stitches. Now this wouldn’t bother me too much. AFV has been a family favourite for as long as I can remember. YouTube fail videos are the bomb around here. I think the problem here is that we don’t fall enough. See, she enjoys it and so when it doesn’t happen often enough, she begins to incite it. She’ll stick her foot out for you to trip over it, or randomly kick you in the butt. And, of all nine of her kids, I am her favourite one to pick on. I don’t know why. Ask her, although that will do you little good- I’ve tried. I don’t think that she has a good reason; at least, not good enough for me. 

For a while, I took it like a good child- ducked low when I walked by, asked her “Why?” when she did it, didn’t really retaliate....

Now, it has all changed. When I asked her to stop, she didn’t. When I tried to be on her good side, I was rejected. She started a war and it has escalated quickly. If she punches me, I usually punch her back- or find some other form of revenge. Sometimes my dad gets frustrated by our nearly-constant bickering or from having to break us away from a fight on the couch.

Just to make this clear, we would never actually hurt each other… much. I know that my mom loves me and I love her.

Now, on with the stories.

Yesterday, we were sitting beside each other on the couch. We were about to do biology and the triplets (I’m not sure how many of them) had been playing on their iPods, so my mom took them. She then proceeded to ask for mine.

“Give me your iPod,” she said. Of course, I knew that I had done nothing wrong to deserve such treatment (as is usually the case) and so I refused. We had a [physical] fight over it and she grabbed my side with her nails. (She has long nails and they are painful when they are digging into your side- I just wanted to clarify that.) So I did the only logical thing- cracked her in the knuckle with my iPod. Justus came running over to stop us- he's good at that- and jumped on my mom. He then slept with his head on the couch between us for the next 45 minutes. He's a good dog. My Mom still has a bit of a bruise from my iPod that she complains about excessively. She deserved it. In the end, my iPod did end up in her possession but I got it back long before any of the triplets did. I won’t say how since she’s going to read this blog.

This is only one example of the not-so-loving side of our relationship. I won’t even go into the times that she’s thrown potatoes and erasers at me or called an “iPod-free day” because I spent a few too many minutes on Instagram or Temple Run (usually Instagram). Today, we realized that the ear infections I’ve been getting are probably due to a dairy allergy like Elijah and Jeddy have. We decided that I should probably cut dairy out of my diet and she laughed at me. Then she gave me a pop tart. See? She can be nice sometimes, but only if she starts to feel bad. Which isn’t usual. Besides, I always get her back. From hiding her makeup brushes, to exploding a kidney bean on her nose, I will find a way to make her pay, which then turns the fight into a full-scale war that lasts all day. 

I hate to admit that I usually lose. 

Except we don’t decide on a winner- it kind of just dies down. So I win. Kind of. Either way, 

I guess we just have a special kind of relationship. It's annoying sometimes but it's also fun and I think the fact that we can fight and then get over it is really good for both of us. It has taught me to forgive and also not to take things too personally. 

Through it all, I know that she loves me, and I wouldn’t trade her for any other mom in the world. Even one that doesn’t like to throw things at me.

My Sour Patch Kid and Other News…

Can I just start by commenting on how amazing the weather has been this summer!? After the longest winter that I can remember, I was welcoming the warmer days with open arms. I’m not one to complain about the heat anyways- unless I’m pregnant and our central air breaks down (yep, that happened during the ONE super hot week) but I have been LOVING the 20 degree days. Today, Scott and I sat on the porch for over an hour with Addy while we watched the older kids play and ride bikes. Amazingly enough (they are my children) we only had one accident when Lily was running full speed down the sidewalk, tripped over her own feet, and skinned a knee.

 

Speaking of Lily hurting herself (this child is accident-prone) she was riding her Little People school bus through the living room like a skate board and I said, “Hun, please be careful. You could fall and bump your head.” She came right back with, “Don’t worry. I won’t hurt my head. I’m wearing my pretend helmet!” She has also started referring to Scott as “Hun” now when she wants to argue her point. I have no idea where she got that from!

Not the best picture- but Justus was trying to lay on her lap and she found it hilarious! This was after he had joined her for a timeout!

The last few weeks I’ve been taking two kids with me when I go grocery shopping. Well, three including Addy! Usually the boys aren’t really interested, but they both wanted to come with me last week. I’m kind of convinced now that it was all a big rouse to get me to buy more junk food… Taking the two boys is definitely different than taking two girls. The boys turn everything into a race or competition.

Who can find the fruit mom just named first!?

Who can throw the bagels into the cart from the farthest away?

Let’s race down the empty aisle while hip-checking each other into shelves!

Yes… this is what mom had in mind when she asked who wanted to come and HELP with the grocery shopping.

They made it entertaining at least. They were also more than willing to lift all the heavy items and help as soon as I needed it. So I got them pickles… and Peanut Butter Cheerios? Blah! But they were happy. I love my boys.

Teaching Ella how to play chess.

This wrap has been such a HUGE help so far. I started looking into them when I was pregnant, but had a hard time with the cost of a new one. I found several pins where people had made their own, but I couldn’t find fabric for much less than what I would pay for the wrap anyways. Then during a middle of the night nursing session it dawned on me that I had seen jersey/knit sheet sets on sale at Target. Jersey-knit would work perfectly! So for $20 I got a fitted sheet, a pillow case, a homemade wrap (using material from the flat sheet), and some leftover fabric for … I’m not sure yet. :) Plus, I was able to get a cute grey and white striped material that I really like! Addy has spent hours in the wrap already and it is pretty much a miracle how quickly it puts her to sleep.

We took the kids to the beach last week and had the most relaxing day in a long time. We wanted to get there early when the beach is empty, but it was pretty chilly in the morning. I joked with the kids that they were doing a polar bear swim! Thankfully it got warmer in the early afternoon. Nothing quite like building sand castles while listening to the waves and then driving home with the windows down.

I am so thankful for pretty well-behaved kids. Yes, they have their moments… but we got up and out to the beach and spent the day there with 9 kids and get this… it was relaxing! Other than when we found out the bathrooms were all closed for reno’s and we had to drive around looking for an outhouse… But seriously, children are a blessing. My children are a blessing to me.

The girls were talking about how many kids they were each going to have and someone told Charity that she would probably have more than me. She said, “No… I don’t think I have the patience for that many kids!”

I said, “I didn’t think I had the patience for 9 kids either.”

To which she replied, “Yeah, you don’t.”

She claims that she was just kidding, but I’m not so sure.

The girls and I have also started working out together. After the first day of our plank and squat challenge, Charity decided that she was never working out with me again. Ha! Her core muscles were aching. I tried to tell her that it was a “good ache”- she wasn’t impressed.

Keona and I went out for breakfast on the morning of her 14th birthday. We went to Timmy’s and then sat in the car at the park with Addy. She had been saving up her money for a while and finally decided to buy herself an iPod touch on her birthday. So now my daughter has Instagram. That still seems weird to me…

Our annual selfie picture on Keona’s birthday.

And last but definitely not least… It seems as though Lily finally has this potty training thing down. We’ve gone two weeks now without any daytime accidents! We even ventured out a couple of times without remembering to put her in a pull-up and she was fine! I am always incredibly relieved when they get it. My 8th kid and I still feel like I’m winging it with the whole potty training thing. Every one is so different…

We like to refer to Lily as our “Sour Patch Kid”.

First she’s sour. Then she’s sweet!

Couldn’t be a more accurate description of her personality…

One Month Summed Up

It’s hard to believe that a month has gone by already.

I knew that I wanted to do a month by month photo project like I did with Lily, but I hadn’t decided how or what exactly I was going to do yet. I kinda wish I had a belly and newborn shot in this same position… but months 1-12 will have to do! Eve is actually responsible for reminding me each month, and for taking the photographs. She has become quite interested in photography and she practices with my camera every chance she gets.

Here’s another one that she took of Addy and I recently…

My baby is a cuddler. I can’t really blame her… I’d much rather sleep cuddled up to Scott than in a bed by myself. So far, she is not a fan of her crib. She spends the majority of the night snuggled up to my side. We’ll start gradually making the transition now that she is sleeping more than 2 hours in between feeds at night.

She has officially outgrown all of her “preemie” sizes and is filling out the newborn outfits. She loves car rides, and being in the sling when we’re out.

She has had some visitors over the last few weeks…

Aunty Sarah and Adam have been out to see her a few times. The older kids convinced us to take them to the park on the hottest day of summer and I had a lady tell me that she “could just eat the baby!” Haha… Definitely gave me and my sister a laugh.

My grandma and great grandma also came out to meet Addy. Mama (Addy’s great-great grandma) couldn’t wait to hold her. One of the kids carried her out of the room at one point and Mama started looking around and asking, “Where’s the baby gone?” I’m pretty sure she would have held her all night if Addy hadn’t wanted to eat.

 

Lily loves looking through my photo albums. There is a picture of grandma Joy with her arms crossed in one of them and Lily always turns to that page when we talk about her. Grandma got a good laugh out of Lily’s impression of her!

Speaking of Lily…

She was my first girl to be born with hair. She was also an answer to my prayer for a girl with curly hair like mine. I love her curls. I especially love(d) the one that hangs down in front of her face all the time…

Yep, that one…

Last weekend she got up before everyone else and decided to go into the older girls’ room to wake them up like she does all the time. Sadly, somewhere along the way she found a pair of scissors…

…and she snipped off that adorable little curl in the front and gave herself some seriously short and crooked bangs. :(  

It really could have been a lot worse. I’m so thankful that the rest of her hair was still up in a ponytail from the day before. I can only imagine the damage she would have done if it was all down. You can kinda see the bangs in the Instagram picture of her with Grandma Joy above. It still makes me sad every morning when I do her hair!

On another note, three of the kids had a blast at VBS last week! This was for crazy hat day.

Ella wanted a Rapunzel hat...

Jeddy wanted a race car one…

And Elijah wanted to be a tree with a parrot in it. (He was on the parrot team)

The girls were such a huge help making these! After about 2 hours of working on them Keona says, “Now I see why you just made me make my own hat when I was in VBS!”

Yes, I didn’t have 4 older daughters to help me then- I had 4 toddlers running around!

I think they did a good job. The girls came up with some pretty creative ideas!

And just because I’m sure she’ll be thrilled I’m going to share one last story…

When my aunt was getting ready to leave the other night, Prayer ran inside to get a pie for her to take home. Prayer came running out the door, down the front steps, and said, “Here… catch!” As she pretended to throw the pie box to her. Only problem was… the pie didn’t stop moving when she stopped the box. We watched in slow motion as the entire pecan pie slid out of the box, into the air, and landed upside down on the front lawn.

“I wasn’t going to actually throw the pie!”

That’s Prayer for you…

 

 

 

I’ll be back with pictures from our family photo shoot that we had done right before Addy was born!

My People

The day that we arrived home from the hospital with Addy, I couldn’t have been more excited. The kids had each been able to see her quickly at the hospital, but Charity was the only one who got to hold her. Quite honestly, it was sad and a little bit scary to see her hooked up to wires and machines… So to finally have our baby at home where they could hold her and kiss her – I couldn’t wait!

We let them hold her in order from youngest to oldest.

Lily calls her “my baby”. When they came to visit us at the hospital, I went out to meet them at the van and Lily saw me and said, “Where’s my Addy!?!?” I brought her into the hospital (and she looked absolutely adorable in her Sunday best) and she was adored by all the nurses! She reached into the incubator to hold Addy’s hand and said, “My baby’s coming home to sleep in my crib?” Broke my heart to have to bring her back out to the van, say goodbye, and send her home without her baby… so this was special.

She was so amazed by everything about Addy. “Look at her tiny nose! Her have tiny hands! And tiny lips! Addy’s so CUTE! I have to kiss her…” She continued pointing out all things “tiny” for the rest of the day. :)

Excuse the hair… this was first thing in the morning and I need my tea before tackling such tasks.

Ella doesn’t remember when Lily was a baby. So this was all new to her. She commented everyday on my “ginormous” belly (which she was so kind to point out was still “big” when I came home.. haha) she loved feeling the baby kick, and couldn’t wait to hold her new brother or sister.

She still smiles like that every time she holds her. One night we were all up a bit late and Ella was holding Addy. She said, “Cuddling Addy makes me feel like falling asleep cause she’s so comfy!” Five minutes later we looked over and Ella was asleep sitting up with Addy in her arms. But seriously… she’s already a pro at rocking her to sleep.

Her tiny fingers!

 

The boys are slightly competitive. About everything. They even debate over who holds the baby better, who is better at putting her to sleep, and who mom lets hold her while she isn’t in the room… They are both pretty good big brothers.

Elijah claims that he’s never getting married and having kids, but in his words, he “can’t stop giving Addy kisses!” Elijah likes to cuddle her when she’s quiet and sleeping. Jeddy tries to take her whenever she’s upset. He likes to rock her and try to put her to sleep. She’s got the best of both worlds. Until she is big enough to start breaking their lego sets… ;)

The triplets have been debating about who will be her favourite for my entire pregnancy. They say that Eve gets the babies because they always like her best. Prayer is best with the toddlers and Charity is better with the older kids because she’s the most patient. Which is mostly true… Eve was always the one to put Lily to sleep when she was a baby, and now as a toddler- Prayer is definitely her best buddy. Lily wakes up in the morning and yells, “Somebody! Somebody come get me!” If no one comes, or they aren’t quick enough for her liking… Then she turns to, “Prayer! PRAYER! PRAYER!!!”

Really, they are all pros.

Addy will never lack attention!

Keona is my helper around here. This all comes naturally to her now. She has been through several of my pregnancies, births, and babies- all that she’s old enough to remember. She was almost 2 when the triplets were born and she would try to help me then by sitting her toys on their heads, hugging them a little too tight, or pushing the swings a little too fast…We were laughing about all of those memories the other day, but she’s a pretty amazing helper now.

I was telling Scott that I feel like I’m living my dream.

Our life is far from perfect. We have things I wish I could change and can’t. We have arguments. We have kids that fight, scream, tattle, and disobey sometimes.

We have problems.

But I can’t think of anyone’s problems I’d rather have. Or anyone else I’d rather share them with.

Our home… is my safe place.

I’m so incredibly grateful for each and every person that I’m so blessed to share it with.